Random imageNew forum topicsSponsorUser loginActive forum topicsRecent blog postsRecent comments
Currency Rate
|
Finding a Nica woman to marry.Submitted by buc10001 on 2 July, 2008 - 17:38.
I'm a retired American man looking to move to Nicaragua and live there permanently. How does one go about arranging a 'marriage of convenience', where the woman would teach me her language and culture and I would financially take care of her, and possibly 1-2 of her children? Is there a Nica 'Lonely Hearts' club that is legitimate? ( categories: )
|
NavigationWho's onlineThere are currently 4 users and 17 guests online.
Online users
Who's new
PollHow do you/would you educate your children? Public school 24% Private religious school 26% Private non-sectarian school 20% Home school 7% Don't have/want children 24% Total votes: 46 A ThoughtCochona is common slang for lesbian. |
Mike's comment is extremely well thought out, however, .....
I know some Nica ladies who will do it....for a small fee
yes, by all means
contact will!
when government grows, liberty yields, thomas jefferson
you have
a great sense of humor. You must be a ball of fire at a party.
"I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure." -Clarence Darrow
I would shy away form making
I would shy away from making "arrangements" - not just Nicaragua, but any other place. I think that would skew the results for culture.
If you have some time, go down there for 30 days and plant yourself some place. I disagree with the "shun the gringos strategy" outlined below - they can be your training wheels to get you started. They'll introduce you to some folks, and soon you'll have a momentum all your own. I also don't buy the class thing - love, if that's what it really is, transcends synthetic barriers such as class.
It's a very nice place - just go without any expectations and chill. You'll soon find yourself in many situations and you'll have options. Arrangements limit you. Situations are interesting.
You're one for two
Yes you're right, do hang with Gringos but be very careful to avoid the douchebags that wash up on the coasts of Cent America in large numbers. Find decent latinos to hang with too and try to spend more of your time with them.
No you're wrong about love transcending all. This is a very romantic Western concept and only North Americans and Europeans truly buy into it. Barriers of class, culture and language are not synthetic, they are real and tangible and if they are all in present in a relationship then they are insurmountable.
Synthetic barriers of class
Synthetic barriers of class are for lemmings. They exist, but are not mandatory. Ever hear of cinderella or if you do not care for fiction, Edward VIII?
respectfully disagree about class...class transcends all
Artist: ("The Love Boat" by Paul Williams and Charles Fox) Song: The Love Boat
Love, exciting and new Come Aboard. We're expecting you. Love, life's sweetest reward. Let it flow, it floats back to you.
Love Boat soon will be making another run The Love Boat promises something for everyone Set a course for adventure, Your mind on a new romance.
Love won't hurt anymore It's an open smile on a friendly shore. Yes LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE! It's LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE!
when government grows, liberty yields, thomas jefferson
Double respectfully, then it
Double respectfully, then it can't be love.
i'll buy the fdc....
it would take a long time to explain, but infatuation is different than love.
when government grows, liberty yields, thomas jefferson
As long as it is Siente Anos
You know I don't drink the cheap crap. Oh, and I'm pretty sure Paul Williams and Charles Fox didn't write "when government grows, liberty yields, thomas jefferson" - I don't even remember that being in the song.
hello lonely heart
good look in your endeavor if you have good intentions. otherwise i wish you rott in hell , God only knows what you have in mind you sick bastard.
you are probably one of many white supremasist that want to conquer our land, leave us alone, don't try to internve in our business, our land will be better without all you stupid tourist visiting .
you are not welcome in Nicaragua.
and what marvelous
way to introduce yourself to the group.
from your bio;
"Biography
My name is Rolando Bemudez and I studied human behavioral ecology.
Interests
In understanding the origin of human behavioral as it develops across the life course and in diverse social cultural contexts. Birthday 14/09/1982,
Your interest in Nicaragua [,] I lived in nicaragua."
FYI...when you use either Internet Explorer , Firefox, or Opera browsers... the red underlined words aren't spelled correctly and right clicking the mouse when the cursor is over the word will correct your error.
Okay, so all you tourists...go home Rolando says you are stupid and must leave. Take your money and leave, go home and call your congressman and have a stop to all US dollars being sent to Nicaragua by anyone. Rolando says we are trying to intervene in "our business" so no more money to relatives back in Nicaragua, no foreign aid, nada.
"our land will be better without all you stupid tourist visiting ."
That should be placed on the front of the Sandino airport.. Big letters.
A few questions came to mind;
I for one wonder WTF is "human behavioral ecology."
also you wrote; "Your interest in Nicaragua I lived in nicaragua."
Soo are you maybe in the USA now...
"good look in your endeavor if you have good intentions. otherwise"....
-Doug ©
If you're not part of the solution, you're part of the precipitate
doug
hello doug , i was wondering do you live in nicaragua, if so what are you doing here? it is obvious that you got perhaps offended by my comment well I speak for most of us here in nicaragua, you are probably an american right? what type of tourism do you engage when you come to nicaragua? be honest.
stupid patriota82
you don't speak for me and no nicaraguense. es por genta como vos estupida que el pais esta en la mierda. Problablemente eres sandinista cagado. Pero pronto les caera el dia. Para todos los analfabestias como tu, la mejor solucion es ignorarlos, porque es lo que son ignorantes. Porque no haces algo productivo para mejorar la situaccion del pais, y no para seguir undiendolo...
I have a small farm..
we are finishing our residency now, and I will be living there soon.
In the past when I was flying down, I went straight to the farm from Managua. I don't care for tourist type stuff, my interests are based around my farm and that local area.
The whole tourism thing is based on cheap fuel and will be ending soon anyway, just relax and watch.
But where will Nicaragua look to replace that money coming in ? From all the USA educated Nicaraguans that are coming back to create jobs and businesses that will help their country? I must have missed that somewhere.
And yes, like you I am an "american", but I guess I have been hanging around with different Nicaraguans than you do, for the most part I have been welcomed by everyone I have met, there is a grumpy old man down the road from me, never returns a wave or smiles, but he throws rocks at his neighbors chickens too.
I think if you got out of your tourist destination city for a while you might meet some of them too. I have found a beautiful country with great people, I am sorry if your experiences are different.
I am wondering if tourist from South America would be welcomed by you and "most of us here in nicaragua" ? How about Asia, Africa...or maybe just the white ones should stay home ?
you are right I did take offense to the 'broad brush' you use on both north and central Americans and do not believe your words speak for the majority of either.
-Doug ©
If you're not part of the solution, you're part of the precipitate
Doug is a VERY Nicaraguan
Doug is a VERY Nicaraguan name. You're not the block captain - he doesn't have to tell you what type of tourist he is. You should look to the stars and thank them whenever an aluminum tube of 200 gringos (@$500-800 a pop) magically appears from the heavens and lands at MGA, only to be shook down not even 10 minutes from getting off the plane.
If you had taken advantage of the Sandinista program that would taught you how to read, and a quick perusal of the Monroe Doctrine would have enlightened you that Nicaragua is, in fact, our business.
Did you conquer the Spanish and expel them from your land? No, you didn't - we did that for you. You should be grateful that we are there to help you, even after all the gold is gone. When was the last time a Nicaraguense, say one of your Presidents, ever helped you?
Please spare us
your silly, chauvinistic American patriotism. If the USA was indeed the knight on the white shining stallion saving the world's nations from themselves, the USA would not be viewed as negatively as it is by other peoples sharing this globe.
uh...
The US is viewed negatively by uneducated people who have no clue. Imaginate, in Nicaragua they don't even know what a Jew is or even what it means, so how are they going to have a proper view of the world at large if their education is that severely restricted? They are taught what the government wants them to know, that the US is this big bad imperialistic bully. But why, still, are so many people in Nicaragua for example clamoring to get there? Because they are the smart ones who chose to supplement their education with a healthy dose of reality??
"I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure." -Clarence Darrow
Well, looking at your
Well, looking at your profile, looks like you don't have any patriotism. What is it - too ashamed or too embarrassed? I can see how recounting historical fact might be mistaken as amplified patriotism - gush, if there is even such a thing as too much patriotism.
Developing countries are like kids. Well, our sweet kids aren't kids anymore - they are teenagers. It's so hard to be cool in your teenagers eyes. Take away their allowance, and you'll see how much they like us.
For personal reasons
I deleted an extensive profile, shortly before the right wingers set up their alternative site. I am quite proud of the land of my birth. In respect to my comment to your entry, the key word was "chauvinistic" - I have no problem with the fact you have pride in your nation. But like you, I too have studied your history. I don't recall anyone, anywhere, anytime granting the USA the right to promugate and enforce the Monroe Doctrine. I somehow also fail to remember the right of the USA to promulgate and excercise its' Manifest Destiny which entitled it to seize territories (Texas, for example) from other political regimes, some of those territories not even in this hemisphere! But then, perhaps, I just didn't study the right kind of US history books and hence therefore am in error for suggesting you are chauvinistically patriotic.
can you help me?
i thought santa ana invited stephen f. austin and some others to settle. then he changed the constitution. upset the texians. they beat him with an underwhelming force. for 10 years texas was a country and then agreed to come into the union. where was the manifest destiny there? help me help me....
when government grows, liberty yields, thomas jefferson
unless your people came over..
the Siberian land bridge, they stole someone else land too.
http://archaeology.about.com/od/kennewickman/Kennewick_Man_and_the_New_W...
-Doug ©, claiming tribal status of Kennewick Man
PS- you all owe me rent, it was due on the 1st... :)
If you're not part of the solution, you're part of the precipitate
Good luck
I'm still trying to collect for the Ramstein base in Germany. The response I get: "Check is in the mail!" :-)
Well, to speak frankly,
Well, to speak frankly, power gives us that right. And we believe that power in rooted in the good of mankind, conferred to us based on merit, guided by our principles and values as a people.
Mexico's land is sacred - just ask them. For whatever reason, maybe they were drunk, at the signing of the Treaty of Guadalupe Hidalgo, they accepted millions of dollars in exchange for their "sacred" land. I know, I know, Adelita rolled over in her grave.
If you are proud of your birth, what exactly is it?
Are you pissed about the Somoza thing? Hey, we're a bit more enlightened, and this being the information age and all, US-backed guys like him wouldn't last a week. We don't stand up dictators any more - that's Daniel's job now - another point on how we've evolved and he's still ramping up. These days, we push for democracy in even the most impossible places like Iraq.
Don't you have a block captain sponsored square dance to attend to in Esteli tonight?
well said
awesome!
"I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure." -Clarence Darrow
Cheap Eduardo Baca Aguilar
Cheap Eduardo Baca Aguilar Lacayo knock-off - not even any good at it. It's shameful and cheapened even further now that Eduardo's death was recently announced on another site.
Easy
Depending on your level of "support", I am sure I can find you a wife, perhaps even one that speaks both English & Spanish & if your level of "support" is satisfactory I can find you a trilingual wife (spanish,english,miskito). The marriage will be very "convenient", even beneficial for both parties, they will take money & you will give money, can't get much more "convenient" than that.
Good Luck
Visit this website
www.pendejo.com
Nic
Nic, what you are proposing is a recipe for disaster. Every older Gringo I've ever met who has hooked up with a local woman in this type of marriage of convenience ends up very unhappy -- every single one.
You have to understand that both parties in this type of relationship are exploiting each other, which makes for a marriage that goes sour fast.
The chance that you will find a decent self-respecting women in Central America who will enter into this type of marriage, even someone who is desperately poor, is non-existent.
Any Central American woman who marries a Gringo for this reason is a gold-digger or prostitute, and /or a woman who is just interested in getting a U.S. Visa. There are plenty of women in each of these categories who prey on unsuspecting Gringos. It will always be a loveless marriage.
What I propose you do is very different. First, rent a place in Nicaragua for one year before you decide to move here permanently. Rents are cheap and you can live very well here on $1,000 per month.
Work hard to learn Spanish and be very careful to avoid other Gringos who lead a dissolute life (they will get you into trouble fast and the women who hang out with them are whores), as well as English-speaking Nicaraguan greaseballs who hang around older Gringos like flies to befriend them in order to rip you off.
Try as much as you can to integrate yourself with decent local folks, perhaps by volunteering your skills to a church mission or NGO that works here. Go out of your way to befriend upstanding local families who lead moral lives. They will be delighted to introduce you to good women.
Keep up appearances ... dress well (not in t-shirts, flip-flops and shorts), shower and shave each day, exercise, watch what you eat and drink. Decent women of all classes turn up their noses at gringos who walk around like slobs.
Over the course of a year you will discover whether you really want to live in Nicaragua -- it's not the U.S. and it will take a big adjustment. And if you do as I advise, you will begin to meet women who are good marriage material.
The good news is that Central America is paved with lovely single mothers in their late 30s and 40s who make wonderful wives and would consider dating an older Gringo, but ONLY if he is a considerate gentleman who leads a decent life, if he can get by in Spanish (they don't speak English) and shows respect for their country's customs. But a woman like this will never become intimate with you unless she is certain that you will be a good family man who will treat her children affectionately and generously. So show her that you're that type of guy.
Avoid internet dating sites like www.latinamericancupid.com. They mainly attract the wrong sort of woman.
Don’t marry her if she comes from a lower social class than you, the class, cultural and social differences will be too much for you to overcome.
Don't marry her unless you can carry on an intelligent conversation with her in Spanish.
Be aware that when you marry a latina you marry her entire family. She will expect you to chip in to help out parents or siblings who are in financial trouble but you have to draw the line or you will end up supporting drones who treat you as though you were an open bank account.
Make it clear to each woman that you date that you are considering moving here permanently and will not marry anyone here until you have decided not to return to the U.S.
Do not under any circumstances marry if you need to go back to the States for any length of time. Long-distance relationships between Gringos and local woman always fail.
Don’t marry her if she has children by different fathers.
Don’t marry her unless she has been living separately from the father of her children for more than one year.
Above all else, don’t marry her if she was the one who first approached you rather than the other way round, especially if she is fluent in English.
Good luck.
Very
well said Mike...I wish more gringo's shared these very same views as yourself. Good Luck to all :)
FINDING A WIFE
You should follow this advice .This will work .You need time not only to adjust to the difference between the Latinas you will meet and the American women you know ,but also to the differences in everyday life. Life on a daily basis is very different in Central America than that in the states. MOST IMPORTANT!! DO HANG OUT WITH THE LOSER GRINGOS YOU WILL MEET THEY WILL ONLY BEAT YOU OUT OF WHAT EVER THEY CAN AND RUIN YOUR REPUTATION .YOU KNOW THE TYPE. If any descent woman sees you in the company of these guys ,you will be per sieved as the same type of man and she will run in the other direction. Latinas are not stupid! They want a man with good values. I am sure if you take you time you can find the person you seek .Given you are sincere and not some kind of prick or a want to be playboy and you truly want to meet a good woman to share the future with.
Hello
hello , God bless for all you wrote. it is almost accurate, i don't like gringos myself, but not all of them travel to nicaragua with the sole purpose of engaging in forbidden sexual behavior with usually underage kids, you are one of the few who make a difference and keep an open mind.
Nicaraguan greaseballs???
oye gringo pendejo!!!
If I heard you make such a comment outloud in a managua street, I myself would have been tempted to put several .45 cal slugs in your head.
this attitude shows the gringo racist mindset that is latent. You guys come here to RAPE the land, and take advantage of those poor rascally nicas. You come here as an alien invader, and you act as if you own the !@$%$ place.
That is why when the nicas start getting fed-up with you, you will regret it. We Nicaraguans are very very slow to anger, but when the fuse is lit....watch out.
As for the gringo who needs poontang, he should head to a more receptive place...Bangkok perhaps!
Upset?
How many Nicaraguan's get upset when they go to WU every month to pick up their allowance?? None I know.
Gueguense
My friend please don't get upset about nothing.
If you read that sentence again, you will find that I am warning the guy who started this thread: stay from low-lifes in Nicaragua, some of them will be Gringo degenerates, and some will be Nicaraguan greaseballs.
Gueguense, we both know that there's a certain type of Nicaraguan who learns English and hangs around in discos and carwashes in MGA and SJDS, licking the boots of tourists and expats who are only in Nicaragua for sex and cheap liquor. We also know that these Nicans are only a small minority.
I did not say that ALL Nicaraguans are greaseballs. In fact, I said the opposite. If you read my post again, you will find that I said that Nicaragua is full of upstanding, decent, moral Nicaraguans. These are the people Gringo expats should hook up with, not the low-lifes.
The person that started this somewhat strange thread
solicited some very emotional responses from some of the Nicaraguan nationals on this board.
While I do not really subscribe to some of the wording used, I can certainly understand the reaction and the sentiment!
When I first read the post my reaction was WTF..??.
It is my opinion that the attitude that everything, including females, is for sale in Nicaragua reeks of insensitivity and arrogance. This opinion is reinforced by another post by the same person: http://www.nicaliving.com/node/12558#new and I quote: "It would seem like a poor country heavily in debt would make it easier for foreigners to move to."
I tend to agree with some of the posters here, that maybe buc10001 is not going to be welcomed in Nicaragua. I would suggest that buc10001 consider another country to look for his marriage of convenience.
With his attitude toward Nicaragua and Nicaraguans this country may turn out to be an unhealthy place for him. We would not want to have anything happen to a lovable character such as him.
Since buc10001 tells us he is a retired farmer, he probably has Nicaraguan women confused with the breeding cattle he may be used to working with.
What would his reaction be if someone would classify the majority of North Carolina women as hookers and freeloaders?
But then again, as we can see there are some posters that would be more than willing to "hook him up with the right girls". While some are clearly kidding some may be more than willing to actually pimp.
I sincerely doubt he cares...
what you may say about North Carolina women. And I also doubt he has Nicaraguan woman confused with the breeding cattle he may be used to working with. That is a pretty rude and insulting statement to make, don't you think? I am really not sure why those sort of insinuations are tolerated by the moderator, but I refrain. What are you really implying? Do you dare to really say it?
What exactly does "We would not want to have anything happen to a lovable character such as him" mean? Why would anything happen to him? Who would harm him? Eric Volz is no longer in the country.
Also, why is it that YOU are welcome here, but he is not? Who makes THAT determination? If someone has a different goal than you in coming to Nicaragua, then they are not welcome? Maybe he should just become a "real estate salesperson" and he'll be just fine and no one will want to do him any harm? And what is "somewhat strange" about the post? I think it is quite common for some older ex-pat gentlemen for whom love has been to date elusive, to come to Nicaragua to get married, at least it seems to be a pervasive theme amongst some of the members here...Perhaps he just hasn't had the good looks or "luck" to find one in the US...by the way, are you married or do you have a "love interest"? If so, is that person Nica? Just curious...
By the way, speaking of Real Estate, if you are interested in what others are saying about the activities of some Expat Real Estate salespeople that also happen to be from Canada, like yourself, you should read this recent post:
http://www.nicaliving.com/node/12568
One may draw some interesting conclusions from the info contained therein.
Exactly what is wrong with
Exactly what is wrong with sex and cheap liquor? Hmm?
Mike's comments
are very good advice. Don't jump into the frying pan. Forming relationships of any kind are always reciprocal.Having lived, worked and traveled 75 countries I've learned some hard lessons. Some cultural and social differences are hard to bridge. If and when I ever find a woman that I want to marry it's going to have to be for good companionship rather just plain sex. I recently ended a 7 year relationship with a Mexican girl. It just wasn't going to work out. I remain friends with her, and with her son Antonio, who is now 17 and has a wife and baby already.As Mark mentions above a lot of the problems were based on differences in class, culture and society.I understand poor as I came from hardscrabble-hillbilly stock myself and I grew up mostly with poor Cubans and black folks in New Orleans and Key West. But education, military,learning a few languages, lots of travel-It changed me. Some folks don't like change and fear that which they don't know. You can't change their world view anymore than they can change yours.If you can't speak the language you haven't learned the culture.I don't concur with Mark on every single viewpoint he has advanced but the bulk of it makes eminent sense.He has written a excellent piece on a lot of the pitfalls of romance abroad.
Marriage of Convenience
Thanx to ALL for your comments! It opened my old eyes. I'm not looking for Love, but I'm also not looking to get ripped off.
So you are looking for love.
So you are looking for love.
Lookin' for love
Artist: Waylon Jennings Song: Lookin' For Love
Lookin' for love
I've spent a lifetime looking for you Single bars and good time lovers, never true Playing a fools game, hoping to win Telling those sweet lies and losing again.
I was looking for love in all the wrong places Looking for love in too many faces Searching your eyes, looking for traces Of what.. I'm dreaming of... Hopin' to find a friend and a lover God bless the day I discover Another heart, lookin' for love
When I was alone then, no love in sight And I did everything I could to get me through the night Don't know where it started or where it might end I turn to a stranger, just like a friend
I was looking for love in all the wrong places Looking for love in too many faces Searching your eyes, looking for traces Of what.. I'm dreaming of... Hopin' to find a friend and a lover God bless the day I discover Another heart, lookin' for love
You came a'knocking at my heart's door.. You're everything I've been looking for..
when government grows, liberty yields, thomas jefferson
C'mon Mike
You are ruining my business, children by only one father, are you nuts? Comes from a lower class, who is he going to marry, a Pellas? Here on the Coast he can find plenty of ladies that speak 2 or 3 languages & will be happy to help him acclimate.
Cookshow
"You are ruining my business" .. I hope you are not in the business I think you're in! :)
Yes, plenty of ladies will help him acclimatize, and after they are done there will be nothing left of him!
Southern Hospitality
Just trying to help the guy out.
I wonder
If Buc is still considering Nicaragua?
Nica Women
Si. I don't let a few ultra-conserative Nica natives spoil my day. Thanx for asking. And just to stir them up again, I'll post another Q.
My guess is that he/she is
My guess is that he/she is compiling data for his/her dissertation/theses.
or
maybe a new york times piece?
when government grows, liberty yields, thomas jefferson